That's A Theory
by MarshmallowAtHeart
Summary: Pre-series. Carrie Bishop offers Veronica some insight as to why Duncan broke up with her. One-shot. LoVe friendship.


Veronica slouched over the counter of _Java the Hut_ and carelessly stirred her cup of coffee as she listened to the terrible renditions of one-hit wonders being sung.

A plate with a piece of cake landed in front of her. Startled, she looked up to see that the only person there was Carrie Bishop. "Uh, I didn't order this."

Carrie's eyes drifted over to Veronica. "It's a special. For moon-y eyed blondes that pathetically wallows in dark corners of cafe's. All you gotta do is eat it."

Wordlessly, Veronica eyed the cake.

"You did learn the basic cutlery skills in prep school, didn't you?" The brunette quipped.

The blonde sighed, picked up the fork and murmured a quick thank you. "What is this?"

Carrie's lips curved. "German chocolate nut-gasm."

Veronica quirked her eyebrow as she fiddled with the fork. Her eyes followed Carrie's movements. "Why are you being nice to me?"

"If you think giving you scraps is nice..."

Veronica gave her a look. Carrie rolled her eyes. "Well, I heard that Duncan didn't even tell you why he broke up with you..."

Veronica cut her off, "Oh, I see, this is your form of a gossip session. Of course, you want the scoop. Go figure."

The taller girl's lips thinned and she glared at the petite blonde. "Yeah, Veronica Mars, because my life totally revolves around you." Veronica didn't respond to her obvious sarcasm. Carrie sighed. "You might be worth a few jabs at school but here you're barely worth the German chocolate nut-gasm."

"Then why'd you give it to me?"

She shrugged. "I figured you might as well have some sort of -gasm considering that Duncan is gay."

Veronica's eyes bulged out, "Excuse me?"

"A week ago, he kissed Logan at Dick's party. And now he's wham bam thank you m'am? Get a clue. You can't really blame him, any guy would question their sexuality after kissing Logan Echolls."

With a frown, Veronica supplied, "That was a dare."

"He didn't have to use tongue."

Veronica's eyes widened in shock.

* * *

A grin curved it's way to Carrie's lips. Susan laughed, "I can't believe she actually believed that."

Carrie shrugged. "It's Veronica Mars, she probably still believes that rainbows come out of unicorns asses." She had tried to be nice but Veronica Mars had to go all righteous on her. As far as Carrie was concerned, she'd got what was coming to her.

* * *

Logan glared at Veronica, but for once, instead of her usual apologetic look, she glared back. Surprised, he looked at her questioningly. She huffed, and turned away.

After class, he caught up with her and remarked, "I don't think you understand how this works."

Veronica glared. "Yeah. I get it. You blame me for your break up with Lilly. And now, I have you to blame for Duncan breaking up with me."

Taken aback by her sudden accusation. "What? That makes no sense. He wouldn't even tell me why."

A growl escaped her lips. "Of course he didn't."

She began to walk away from Logan but he grabbed her hand. "Could you, at least, enlighten me on your sudden war-path?"

"Like you did?" Hurt coloured her eyes. "I wasn't even wrong. You put yourself in that position. You cheated on her, Logan. You knew someone would tell her."

"I didn't expect that person to be you," he argued.

Tiredly, she asked, "Why does that matter?"

"Because, Veronica, you're my friend too."

"And?" She sighed. "Lilly's my best friend. Did you really expect me to keep it a secret? Friends don't ask friends to keep those kind of secrets from their other friend!"

"You didn't even give me a chance to explain."

"Explain that you were being a self-sabotaging jackass? Explain that Lilly hurt you and that you wanted to get back at her? Explain how drunk you were and Yolanda seduced you? I don't care, Logan. And no matter what you could have told me, I would have still told Lilly. Because friends? They have each others backs."

"And you didn't have mine, Ronnie. It was like you chose Lilly over me and it fucking hurt, okay? And after all the times that Lilly cheated on me, not once did you let me know about it."

Veronica shook her head. "Lilly never cheated on you."

Logan scoffed. "Where do you think she was that night?'

"She had a headache," she said, for what felt like the hundredth time.

"God, Veronica, you're so naïve. You really think she was an innocent in all of this," he laughed humourlessly. "Yeah, I was being a self-sabotaging jackass. Only because I was tired of all the bullshit that she continuously put me through. I did want payback, And I was drunk. And I just wanted to make her feel they way she always seems to make me feel." He took in a deep breath. "I'm sorry that I was a jackass to you. I just... how could you not know? You're her best friend."

She exhaled sharply. "Duncan's yours."

Putting aside their differences, he quizzed, "Why did you say that you blamed me for your break up?"

She sighed. "I guess I just wanted to blame someone. And I guess you were just the trigger? I don't know. Maybe after he kissed you, he just had an epiphany or something. But genetics isn't anyone's fault. So, how can you blame someone for the way their born?"

His face scrounged in confusion. "What?"

"Duncan's gay," she told him.

Logan let out a roar of laughter. "Duncan's not gay."

She stared at him.

Logan chuckled and told her again, "Duncan's not gay."

"Logan, Duncan is gay," she insisted.

He sobered a little and shook his head. "Duncan is not gay."

With a sigh, she said, "You kissed him at Dick's party and I guess he liked it."

Logan laughed, "No, he didn't."

She crossed her arms over her chest. "Logan! You've said that your kisses could turn people gay for you."

Stunned at her, he said, "I was joking, obviously!"

She wrinkled her nose at his unwillingness to accept her words. "Then I think that you're underestimating the power of your kisses."

Somewhat amused, he arched an eyebrow. "And how would you know? We've never kissed."

With a blush, she bit her lip, "I have on good account about how well you kiss."

"Really?" He quirked an eyebrow as a smirk danced on his face.

Her blush deepened. "That's besides the point. I'm just saying that you could have triggered his realisation. But being gay isn't a choice which is why I can't be angry at Duncan. I can be mad that he's ignoring me and the way he ended our relationship but... well anyway we learnt in biology it's because of chromosomes," she ended thoughtfully.

Amused, he quizzed, "When did you get his chromosomes tested?"

"What?" She stared at him with confusion and then shook her head. "Anyway. Now that you know, we should be there for him. Show him support so he can..."

"Come out of the closet?" Logan laughed. Sure, he'd support Duncan if Duncan were truly gay. But Veronica was being ridiculous. He'd know if his best friend were gay.

"Be free to be who he is!" She glared at him for his interruption.

"Ronnie! You're being ridiculous. If Duncan were gay, he could have stayed would you and you could have been his beard."

"No!" Veronica huffed. "He wouldn't hurt me like that."

"But he'd hurt you like this?" He snorted. "Ignore you and drive you so crazy that you'd actually go to the point of concluding that he must be gay."

She bit her lip. "Actually, Carrie was the one that-"

"Carrie Bishop?" Logan interjected.

"Yeah." She solemnly nodded.

"You're taking advice from Carrie Bishop." Disbelief coloured his features. "Veronica, she's messing with you."

"She made sense!" Veronica defended. "Besides what was I supposed to do? Duncan's avoiding me. Lilly told me that I'm better off without him and we should go party it up in L.A. And you were mad at me! I didn't know what to do. Carrie offered me some constructive input and I decided to take it."

Logan let out a heavy sigh, closed his eyes for a moment and shook his head.

* * *

Logan hovered beside Veronica as she stood in front of her best friend and demanded, "Lilly, I need you to tell me why Duncan broke up with me. I need you to confirm my suspicion."

Lilly arched an eyebrow. Her eyes darted to Logan, who avoided her gaze. She looked at her best friend and sighed.

Veronica bit her lip and explained, "I believe you when you say that it's not my fault. And I understand that it's not Duncan's either. No one can control genetics."

Lilly's eye's widened. "Oh my God, Veronica. How did you find out?"

Stunned, Logan drew back and asked, "What? It's true? Duncan's gay?"

Lilly's eyes shot to Logan in shock. The dread in her stomach unclenched and she could breathe. Her best friend was not about to have her life turned upside down. But where had they gotten the theory that Duncan was gay? Better gay than brother, right?

Veronica quickly reassured her friend, "It doesn't matter. We'll be there for him. Support him."

The Kane heiress had quickly regained her composition. She could only go along with their theory. "Yes. Duncan is gay." She couldn't believe that she had actually got that out with a straight face. "But he's not ready to come out of the closet so don't tell anyone."

"Well, considering that Carrie Bishop is the one that came up with this theory..." Veronica continued helpless. The story was sure to spread.

* * *

Duncan was furious. Somehow, because of his sister, everyone thought he was gay. He'd been getting all sorts of comments. The girls were all sullen because they couldn't date him but somewhat supportive. The guys cracked jokes and Logan defended him. Seriously, Logan was going along with this? He even punched Dick because of a baseball innuendo. He didn't even play baseball.

Urg. That was so not the point. Everyone had made some kind of comment about his sexuality and it was driving him crazy. When he denied it, instead of believing him, they were reassuring him that he was free to be. Was that some kind of new slogan or something? Why were they all saying it?

He took out his cellphone and dialled his sister's number. When he got her voicemail, he exhaled sharply. "Lilly! How could you tell everyone that I'm gay? I'm so gonna kill you when I get home from soccer practise!"

* * *

… And that's how Lilly Kane died.

 **That's a joke. This story just ended with the voicemail. So I figured since Duncan was Jake Kane's son, everyone would accept him no matter what his sexuality was.**

 **As to where this came from, I have no idea. It just happened. Hope you got a laugh out of it though.**


End file.
